How we Decide, How to Respond through Communication and Work with Others
This article will continue to provide you with high level communication tools. These skills could be used with great effect in managing, marketing, or in your personal life. Well on to the exercises.
Recharging Style (Extrovert, Introvert, Balanced)
I definitely am balanced in this personality style, again because I work on it. I’m naturally an introvert, but I’m so uncomfortable in situations in which people are not talking, I start conversations immediately upon entering a room. Everyone thinks I’m an Extrovert and I do get very charged up in social situations, but I’m also happy when they are over.
There is a big misconception that an Introvert is antisocial. No, they just don’t get energized or relax around other people. They feel taxed. Just because you enjoy and get your best work done while alone is not a negative.
Extroverts have tons of friends and look for the outside word to energize and entertain them. These are the shoot from the hip types. It is to be noted that while they have many friends, they normally have less deep relationships than an Introvert.
To find out who your dealing with ask, “When you need to calm down after a long day do you prefer to take some time alone, or go out with friends?”
Working with Others Style (Independent / Team Player / Leader)
I prefer to get my work done on my own, making me an independent. I know exactly what I need to do to get the job done, but I don’t think it’s worth my time to get others to work.
A team player is comfortable with accomplishing tasks with others, because they expect to reach a point in which they won’t be able to complete the task on their own and want others to back them up.
A leader knows how to accomplish their tasks, plus enjoys getting others to perform as well. Now, I’m not saying that every manager out there fits this type, I’m instead saying that the best leaders possess this quality.
To find out the personality type ask, “Do you value approaching a task on your own, or with a team and can you motivate others to help you complete a task?” The answers are self evident.
Expressing Ones Self Style ( Blamer / Computer / Distracter / Leveler / Placater)
Now you know I’m being honest about my results on this test. Not many people would say this, but I’m a Distracter. In situations in which I’m on good behavior I am a Leveler, which I’ll explain in a minute. A Distracter style constantly switches between all the other styles. One minute I’m a computer, that talks very carefully with little emotion. Then I’m a Placater, that tries to make everyone happy. And, if pushed real hard I can become a Blamer and lash out. So a Distracter Style is all styles at once.
The Perfect style is that of the Leveler. They are always on an even keel, while being comfortable with their emotions, confident, but able to disconnect from emotions, when needed. In life we all strive to be Levelers, but few of us will get there.
You can normally spot how someone expresses themselves after a short conversation. There are no questions needed.
Responsive Style ( Cooperate / Compete / Congruent / Incongruent / Polarizing / Meta )
I’m most comfortable with a Meta Responsive Style. I constantly look for higher meanings in everything. I have a great deal of difficulty just experiencing the moment like a Congruent person does. Congruent’s find themselves in a calm situation and just become their surroundings.
A non-congruent may enter calm surroundings, and feel anger or resentment. They respond in the opposite manor to that which is expected.
Competitive Styles see everything as an opportunity to compete. They constantly are betting, challenging and looking to compete. The Cooperative, on the other hand, does everything they can to make sure everyone wins in any situation.
Finally you have the Polar Style. A Polar assumes that everything isn’t what it seems. They might see the calming serenity as too quite. They then can come to the conclusion that danger may be ahead. Conspiracies would be very welcoming to a person with this style.
To find the style ask, “Do you think it’s normal to feel sad when others around you are happy?”, “Do you find it easier to cooperate with or prefer competing?”, “Do you prefer to live in the moment or analyze situations?”
Social Preparation Style ( Active / Reflective / Balanced )
I actively prepare for social situations and jump in head first, with little to no preparation. I’m referring to social interactions that are spur of the moment, not preparation for a presentation in front of 100 people.
A Reflective style steps back and sizes up the situation. They may choose never to act, if it doesn’t feel right, and it often doesn’t. They fear making mistakes and may have issues with procrastination. The Active on the other hand may make lots of mistakes while being labeled a chatter box.
To find the style ask, “In social situations do you actively engage with many people, or stick by people that you know?”
Chosen Field Style ( Information / People / Planning / Goal )
In my chosen field I obviously focus on information. I’m most comfortable working learning, processing and simplifying information.
Others prefer working with people. They are most interested in the feelings and thoughts of others above all else. They will go out of their way to insert conversations in any activity.
The Planning Style people are only interested in crafting a plan that will get the job done. The people involved are looked at as pawns in the system, and they don’t see why they should concentrate on feelings, unless it messes up the plan.
Finally we have the Goal style. They only see the finish line. They want the job done quickly. And, they often don’t care how it’s done or who gets it done.
To find the style ask, “What is it about your job that makes you happiest?”
Comparison Style ( Facts / Feelings )
I definitely compare things through the use of numbers, facts and expert opinions. If you are trying to convince me of something you better bring all data required to allow me to make an educated decision.
Others prefer to follow their instincts and feelings. They will determine first whether they trust the person providing the information and then act accordingly. Everything to this person feels right or wrong.
To find the style ask, “How do you know that a product represents quality?”
Evaluating Success Style ( Authority / Research / Model / Learned / Experience )
I know that I have accomplished something in the right way after I have studied the process(Research). I talk my way through the whole process and find my conclusions there.
Others will not assume success unless an Authority tells them how to succeed. Once they believe someone is an Authority they will follow their plan blindly.
The Model Style requires the person to find someone who has succeeded already at performing the act and copying them exactly.
The Learned Style will take from what they have learned in school and hypothesis based off of that knowledge, what they should do.
Finally, the Experience Style requires the person to have already performed the action before or an action quite similar. If they can’t remember a situation, that they can use as a guide, they will have no idea whether they’ll succeed or not.
To find the style ask, “When you have to perform a task what information do you trust to help you succeed?”
Need for Closure Style ( Closure / Non-Closure )
I definitely need closure in any situation. I will not leave anything undone and love to complete tasks.
Others have no problem leaving a task unfinished. They figure that they can come back to it later, if something comes up. They more than likely prefer starting projects, but don’t enjoy making sure they are finished.
To find the style ask, “Do you prefer starting projects or finishing them?”
Impression Style ( Social / Real ): I’m more of a Real Style, meaning when I go out in public I dress for comfort and not to be stylish. Of course that changes if I’m trying to impress someone, but in general I’m not very flashy.
Others think it is extremely important to always look their best and judge others greatly by how they look. These people often are more conservative and polite, because they don’t want to say the wrong thing. Both groups will label you, if they don’t think you follow that which they feel is the right way to act.
To find the style ask, “Do you value looking your best when going to the grocery store or do you prefer to just be you?”
Reaction to Aggression Style ( Compete / Cooperation / Results )
When I’m faced with aggression from someone I’m trying to accomplish a task with, I push forward to finish the job. I know people have different ways of accomplishing a task, and as long as it gets done I don’t care how we get there.
Others enjoy interjecting competition into every act to prove that their way is the right way. They are most interested in doing things their way and that others know it.
Finally, you have those that just want to get along with everyone. They will cooperate with either other style as long as no feelings are hurt.
That’s All Folks
Well, you are one article away from being able to figure out any person, solve all interpersonal issues and build rapport at a high level.
If you have any questions leave them below.
Till next time…